Writing exercise 1.

Blood hot and heavy fat laden pushing and coursing, veins

Sometimes working passing air usefully shaking feeling the rushing past the pain

Pieces I don’t see of understand the smell of feet protein condensed water and feeling high, concentrated pain breath and pressure.

Feeling and doing, numb and feeling still doing

Pushing, pushing through pushing away would normally run from this feeling

Too big for the room

Arms and feet extend, pass the boundaries

Almost wearing it (the room)

Arms too big to feel 

Feet disappearing stood on stalks feet fizz away to invisible 

I feel red the noises are disturbed into the rushing of the veins and structures around my face and head. We pulsate together.

Am I exploding or am I exploding? 

Witnessed but alone.

Exercise 2: Entering the room

  • Reaching the metal stairs, feeling the cold handrail feeling relief to be touching something solid.
  • The group of women on the sofas by the door turn to look, nobody smiles, although we are all familiar with each other there is no response, only blank faces. 
  • Behind the bar the male trainer looks directly at me and nods.
  • There is a breeze that lifts high cleansing my path ahead – fresh unbreathed intoxicants into the room ahead of me.
  • The room is mine, all the machines waiting. To move and lift, notch and cog, mechanic jungle scene working together in some kind of unearthly blueprint. 

Writing exercise 3: Virus, if everyone could feel the joy I feel…

The room would sweat, no one would take offence – the bodies would bulge and pulsate.

The air would be full of grunting, occasionally you would get splashed by another’s efforts and suddenly you would be caught needing to join – either pushing myself or helping them. Effort is contagious it vibrates and resonates. Writing one of these moments you can feel but see very little, momentarily all eyes are turned inward looking for that point, the reason.

Once found or touched in an imaginary war we all slip back and wait for another quake of pushing effort come from, pulsating critique and monsters.